As parents we want our children to grow up self-confident and capable. Sometimes without even realising it, we can do the exact opposite and detrimentally affect our child’s confidence.
Saying “it’s easy”
When your children are struggling with a task, it may seem easy to you, however, it is not necessarily easy to them. When you say, “that is easy, you can do it,” you are trying to motivate and encourage them, yet it causes your children to think, “something must be wrong with me because it’s not easy for me”. This causes your children to feel discouraged and want to give up. It decreases their confidence.
Doing too much for them
Your children want to do tasks on their own to give them a great sense of accomplishment and helps them feel good about themselves.
You may feel one way to show your love is doing things for your children. This can rob them of the opportunity to learn life skills and the satisfaction of feeling independent. It can send your children the hidden message, “You are not capable.”
Freaking out when they make mistakes
Mistakes are painful, but they can cause great growth if handled in a healthy way. Children will make mistakes, the way you respond either helps your children learn and grow, or affects them by teaching them mistakes are bad, thus continuing the spiral of self doubt.
If you need help to boost your child’s self confidence contact me.